Sex Positions For Fantastic Sex

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The images in popular culture can make us all feel inadequate when it comes to sex. Men who watch porn may think they should be able to pound away in their hapless girl's vagina until she comes in a screaming orgasm. Women may think they should be able to have five orgasm in a row as soon as a penis appears anywhere near their vagina! The truth , of course, is very different - most men experience premature ejaculation, at least some of the time, when they have sex, especially in certain positions like rear entry, while most women never come during vaginal intercourse.

(Watching porn can give us all a very distorted view of what sex is really like. For example, it's not normal to finish a bout of sex by withdrawing from your girl's vagina and ejaculating over her face. Yet this is what many teenage boys are learning about sex as they watch internet porn.)

Just in case you don't believe me when I say that most men come quickly and most women never come at all during intercourse (and this can be hard to believe; you may even think you're just a poor lover because these things happen to you), a survey conducted by a website designed for and by women proved that only about one woman in five will come during intercourse without any clitoral stimulation. I suspect even the one in five who does come is actually having an orgasm because her clitoris is being rubbed or stimulated in some way during intercourse without her really appreciating that fact. It's a bit like the Coital Alignment technique, which stimulates the clitoris during intercourse and can bring women to orgasm during sex.

Similarly, most men ejaculate within three minutes of penetrating their partner. This was first demonstrated by Alfred Kinsey in 1958, but nothing has change since, as a survey by the German University at Kohn recently proved.

The really important question, of course, is: "Does this matter?" Well...it depends. If you or your partner wants to have vaginal orgasms while you make love then, yes, it matters a lot. Though many authorities say that this is not necessary for good sex, the simple fact is that having the female partner reach orgasm while a couple make love is a very profound experience for both the man and the woman, and it can add greatly to both partners' enjoyment of sex, since most men will come immediately their partner begins to have her orgasm, and the sensation of her vagina gripping his penis as she climaxes will give him great pleasure and most likely cause him to ejaculate as well. Yes: that's what's called a simultaneous orgasm. Now, how are you going to achieve that?

Well, first of all, accept that she's going to need a helping hand or finger on her clitoris. That's how most women who come during sex get to orgasm. (We'll come back to the idea of the vaginal orgasm, reached purely stimulating the G spot during sex, later.) For the moment, I'm going to offer you some ideas for sex positions that can help a couple bring the woman to orgasm during vaginal intercourse.

The most popular position for sex is man on top. It's a good position for many reasons: ease, comfort, more sensation for the man, easy on the woman who can lie back and enjoy it - we all know why we like it. Men can thrust deeply, but of course while this gives him great pleasure, his penis probably doesn't go anywhere near her clitoris. The thing to do is to modify the man on top position so that her clitoris gets some much-needed stimulation. This is the so-called Coital Alignment Technique.

After her enters her, the man shifts his body up so that his penis enters her vagina from a more acute angle. The bottom of the shaft of his penis, where it enters his body, will then be pressed against the general area of her clitoris. He doesn't then thrust; it's more like he's lying on her as the couple rock their bodies against each other. With a gentle motion that massages his penis in her vagina and stimulates her clitoris, it's not hard to time the movements so that the couple reach orgasm together.

For a sexy variation, the woman can lie on the man, in which case the whole position is effectively reversed.

The second best position for a woman to reach orgasm during sex is with her on top, sitting on the man with his penis inside her, facing him. The reason this works is that she can control the depth and angle of penetration, and the speed of thrusting, and the angle at which she lies on her partner, thereby allowing her clitoris to get the stimulation it needs to bring her to orgasm. Essentially she is in charge during sex in this position, and she can modify it as sex proceeds so that her clitoris is stimulated until she comes - and she can control the speed with which this happens.

Another great position for orgasm during sex is rear entry. In this position, there is plenty of opportunity for either the man or the woman to play with her clitoris until she comes. The only problem here might be that men find this position so stimulating, they tend to come very quickly. Mind you, he can always stop moving while she catches up with him, so simultaneous orgasm should still be possible.

Perhaps the best of all positions for female orgasm is side by side sex. This is a romantic position, one which provides the man with much less stimulation, so he can last longer, and which at the same time allows either him or her to play with her clitoris so that she can get to orgasm. Because it's relaxed and romantic, sex in this position can feel much more loving and tender than, say, rear entry. All in all, it's a sex position which will provide all the romantics out there with a superb experience of feeling loving and then enjoying a shared orgasm!

You can read more about all these positions at Sex and Relationships.